“Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of man. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.” - Philippians 2:5-11
The Apostle Paul’s idea of “have this mind” is something like “have this map in your brain” or “let this function at your DNA level.” What we see here is that this movement down in love – Jesus emptying himself, being found in human form, becoming obedient to the point of death – is the path that all of our lives are meant to take. I call it “the master J-Curve.”
When we imitate Jesus and go lower for the sake of love, I call that going through a Love J-Curve. In Love J-Curves, there are steps of love that you choose, and then farther along there are steps you don’t choose. In other words, there’s the falling in love and getting engaged part of a Love J-Curve, and there’s the marriage part. There’s the having the baby part of being parents, and then the having teenagers part.
What we tend to do as we go from the first part to the second is rethink the commitment we made in the first place. People say things like “things weren’t right from the start.” There are, of course, some situations where you really should disengage that commitment. But I’m talking about our tendency in these commitments to simply back out of any and all pain. We regret the commitment to love. We say, “I made a mistake.” Often there are things that we did along the way that were unwise and that we can do better next time. But it’s helpful to see that the J-Curve is the basic structure of love.
When you go from the love you chose to the love you didn’t choose, you’re bearing the weight of love. And that’s why it’s so important that we do what Jesus did in Gethsemane and “take the cup.” With an act of the will, I receive what the father has given me. I don’t push that cup away. It’s important to do that, maybe even to write that out as you’re journaling about painful situations in your life.
When we receive the cup that our Father is giving us, that’s where the Spirit’s power comes.
When we receive the cup that our Father is giving us, that’s where the Spirit’s power comes. Out of Jesus’ constricting, God does this remarkable work of exaltation. The sense of the Greek here is “therefore God,” which means the Father now is reacting. The exaltation of Jesus is the justification of his son. He’s reacting to his son’s shame. He replaces his shame with glory, his humility with honor. There is no other name that is more honored than Jesus around the world.
Are you bearing the cost of love in some area of your life? Have you pushed away the cost, regretting your commitment to love? Pray simply that you receive this death, that you take the cup. Remind yourself that you’re entering the sufferings of Christ. Meet him in the suffering. Watch the story unfold – and keep an eye out for resurrection!
This article is a transcribed portion of Paul Miller’s session, “How Dying & Rising with Jesus Stabilizes Our Souls in a Broken World,” presented at the Christian Counseling & Educational Foundation’s Annual Conference this October in Hershey, PA. A full audio recording can be purchased here. Explore additional resources on the J-Curve here.
